let’s get personal

I will be sharing more personal posts. I had a separate blog, but stopped writing there nearly 6 months ago and I don’t miss that space. I don’t feel like it’s a space I can go back to and I feel very comfortable here, in this space, in this area of passion aimed solely at my goal of becoming a midwife. But midwives have personal lives too. My journey there is not just my own. It belongs to my husband who sees me through the struggles I endure through difficult classes and triumphs with me when I get an A on an exam. It belongs to my children who are the sole reason for my passion in this profession. My son’s pregnancy and birth kick-started this adventure. My daughter gave me hope in my body and strength as I birthed her without an epidural. My family is a huge part of this process because without them, I would not be here today, writing in this space.

Evelyn turned one almost 2 weeks ago and a week prior to her birthday, we had the most beautiful photo shoot., capturing our bond together while breastfeeding. I never made it to 3 months with my son, so meeting the one year mark in our breastfeeding journey was huge. For the last few months she has dropped a few nursing sessions and we were mostly nursing before and after sleeps. My supply decreased as she led it. Working nights has absolutely KILLED my supply. It has no idea what to do with being awake and not nursing, then being home sleeping during the day and still not nursing much. And just like that I can feel that we are coming to the end of our breastfeeding journey very soon. I can feel her growing up right before my eyes as she, rather than gaping her mouth open towards me, she pauses and smiles up at me then turns herself to get off my lap. She has said no ever so sweetly to nursing. And I am sad. I am so so sad that this is ending. I am proud, though, for making it more than 12 months. But sad that I knew this would be coming sometime, just didn’t think it would be this soon.

Ironically, I left my pump at the hospital I float to and have no way of pumping for comfort. I will offer when we get home and see what miss E says. I’m hoping she will help her mama out, but she may not that is okay.

What are your tips/advice for weaning?